Monday, May 4, 2020

More Laughs .....or not!

Words are fun!

  1. What did the traffic light say to the car? Don’t look! I’m about to change.
  2. I just wrote a book on reverse psychology. Do *not* read it!
  3. What did one hat say to the other? You stay here. I’ll go on ahead.
  4. Why wouldn’t the shrimp share his treasure? Because he was a little shellfish.
  5. Two cows are standing in a field. One cow says "Did you hear about that outbreak of mad cow disease? It makes cows go completely insane!". The other cow replies "Good thing I'm a helicopter".
  6. What did the left eye say to the right eye? Between you and me, something smells.
  7. What did the father tomato say to the baby tomato whilst on a family walk? Ketchup.
  8. Why is there a fence around a cemetery? People are dying to get in.
  9. Did you hear about the kidnapping in the park? They woke him up.
  1. How does Darth Vader like his toast? On the dark side.
  2. When will the little snake arrive? I don't know but he won't be long...
  3. Why do fish live in salt water? Because pepper makes them sneeze!
  4. What has three letters and starts with gas. A Car.
  5. How do you get an astronaut's baby to sleep? You rocket!
  6. I think i would like a job cleaning mirrors, it's just something I could really see myself doing.
  7. Why did it take so long for the pirates to learn the Alphabet? They got stuck at C.
  8. I took the shell off my racing snail thinking it would make him go faster, if anything it made him more sluggish.
  9. Somebody stole my Microsoft office and they're going to pay - you have my Word.
  10. Just remember - you never really completely useless, you can always serve as a bad example.

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